Friday, August 14, 2009

How to Wax Your Floors: A Tutorial by the Not-So-Domestic Goddess Katya

Step 1. Cover floor in floor stripper without a plan to avoid kneeling in it.
Step 2. Freak out while wondering how corrosive floor stripper is.
Step 3. Forget about freaking out when you discover how fun it is to skate around on soaked floor on your knees.
Step 4. Scrape wax off.
Step 5. Flood floor with water in an attempt to "rinse" it.
Step 6. Attempt to rid floor of excessive water by flicking it out your front door with a paper plate (for this tutorial you don't have access to a mop), coating your front porch with liquid wax/floor stripper combo.
Step 7. Destroy bathroom towels after step 6 fails.
Step 8. Coat floor with wax and trap yourself in the back of your apartment for 35 minutes until it dries.
Step 9. Decide your floors were never worth waxing in the first place and feel slightly resentful toward your apartment complex.


Diane said...

It sounds like you figured it out!!! How'd you like to do my kitchen this week? A mop is essential...and you are right your apt floors are crapola and not worth waxing.

brown eyed girl said...

I vote...we make one of the random roommates do it at the end of next year... :) haha

and of course, give them full access to your tutorial:)

amanda and dave said...

thaaaaaaaat was hilarious. I loved it. I never want to wax a floor... :)

Kimkidoni said...

Bwa ha ha ha, I was supposed to wax my floor this past year, but I got out of it.

Jody Lynn said...

love it! and dido...why are you waxing crapola floors??

Kellie Rachelle said...

haha wow you made it so much harder on yourself (don't worry, it was still really hard for me). I got all the stuff off by using wet rags. Totally worked and I didn't have a flooded kitchen that I had to drain. But yeah... they're not worth the effort. That was my job after winter semester. Worst job EVER.