WARNING: Obscure, vague, and slightly emo blog ahead. Read at your own risk.
I don't really know how to phrase everything that's going through my mind right now, and I'm not sure if I really want to sort through it all...but alksdhah;cba;hcaewsdh! Meh. I'm all jazzed up and antsy and I'm waiting again! I hate waiting! I just want to know what's going to happen next year, and I want to be settled. It's like last year, hovering over the giant black abyss that is my future (oh boy, now I'm getting dramatic...gah) not sure how the pieces are all going to fit together. And I know that things will come together, because they always do, but I just hate not knowing how. I feel stuck somewhere in between. I want to be on one side or the other! No more of this no man's (is that one word?) land. I just...meh.
Have you guys heard the song "Nicest Thing" by Kate Nash? I swear it is the most depressing song I have ever heard:
All I know is that you're so nice,
You're the nicest thing I've seen.
I wish that we could give it a go,
See if we could be something.
I wish I was your favourite girl,
I wish you thought I was the reason you are in the world.
I wish my smile was your favourite kind of smile,
I wish the way that I dressed was your favourite kind of style.
I wish you couldn't figure me out,
But you always wanna know what I was about.
I wish you'd hold my hand when I was upset,
I wish you'd never forget the look on my face when we first met.
I wish you had a favourite beauty spot that you loved secretly,
'Cos it was on a hidden bit that nobody else could see.
Basically, I wish that you loved me, (Katie's comment: GAH! knife through the heart right there!)
I wish that you needed me,
I wish that you knew when I said two sugars, actually I meant three.
I wish that without me your heart would break,
I wish that without me you'd be spending the rest of your nights awake.
I wish that without me you couldn't eat,
I wish I was the last thing on your mind before you went to sleep.
All I know is that you're the nicest thing I've ever seen;
I wish that we could see if we could be something
And that song has nothing to do with the above, but they both sort of give the same "gahh" contraction in your stomach kind of feeling. And for the second time in this post, let me just say "meh."