on repeat:

Thunder rumbles in the distance, a quiet intensity
I am willful, your insistence is tugging at the best of me 
You're the moon, I'm the water
You're Mars, calling up Neptune's daughter 

Sometimes rain that's needed falls 
We float like two lovers in a painting by Chagall
All around is sky and blue town 
Holding these flowers for a wedding gown
We live so high above the ground, satellites surround us. 

I am humbled in this city
There seems to be an endless sea of people like us
Wakeful dreamers, I pass them on the sunlit streets 
In our rooms filled with laughter
We make hope from every small disaster

Everybody says "you can't, you can't, you can't, don't try." 
Still everybody says that if they had the chance they'd fly like we do. 


"Painting by Chagall" by the Weepies

raindrops

I was a little girl
Alone in my little world
Who dreamed of a little home for me
I played pretend between the trees
And fed my houseguests bark and leaves
And laughed in my pretty bed of green

I had a dream
That I could fly
From the highest swing
I had a dream

Long walks in the dark
Through woods grown behind the park
I asked God who I'm supposed to be
The stars smiled down at me
God answered in silent reverie
I said a prayer and fell asleep

I had a dream
That I could fly
From the highest tree
I had a dream

My dearest friend Amanda already wrote a post with this song, but I just have to steal it and post with it too.

I feel like I have so many things to say, but I don't know how to phrase any of them. Right now it sounds like
stay in San Francisco forever, Berkeley, grad school, PhD? don't want to be lonely in California? fluorescent nano diamonds, don't pigeonhole yourself, industry v. academia, Y Chem, dreams dreams dreams

Makes sense, yeah?
Nope. But that's okay because I've got to finish a French take home test that was due yesterday (ah, what a candidate I am for grad school. goodness).

We'll talk later, okay blogging buddies?
Hope your weeks have been grand!

I'm telling ya, these lyrics have been running through my head nonstop for a week now:

I don't get many things right the first time
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls
Brought me here

And where was I before the day
That I first saw your lovely face?
Now I see it everyday
And I know

That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest

What if I'd been born fifty years before you
In a house on a street where you lived?
Maybe I'd be outside as you passed on your bike
Would I know?

And in a white sea of eyes
I see one pair that I recognize
And I know

That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest

I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you

Next door there's an old man who lived to his nineties
And one day passed away in his sleep
And his wife; she stayed for a couple of days
And passed away

I'm sorry, I know that's a strange way to tell you that I know we belong
That I know

That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest

*edit: This is why I love these lyrics so much: they're so simple and so beautiful. I love that he doesn't finish his sentences: "I am the luckiest"=...the luckiest...guy? "I know we belong"=...we belong...together? He's so taken by this girl that these thoughts are not altogether complete, and it's perfect that way. I'm also loving "I'm sorry, I know that's a strange way to tell you..." Something about that phrasing makes me want to melt. So gooooooood. Anyway, yay for Ben Folds. :)

Pinch me (another good song)

I absolutely adore the John Mayer version of this song.
I don't know why, but I've definitely been on a lyrics-posts kick lately. Maybe I'll post something substantial later.
Read it though, I like the words.

She's a good girl, loves her mama
Loves Jesus and America too
She's a good girl, crazy 'bout Elvis
Loves horses and her boyfriend too
It's a long day living in Reseda
There's a freeway runnin' through the yard
And I'm a bad boy cos I don't even miss her
I'm a bad boy for breakin' her heart
And I'm free, free fallin'
Yeah I'm free, free fallin'
All the vampires walkin' through the valley
Move west down Ventura Boulevard
And all the bad boys are standing in the shadows
All the good girls are home with broken hearts ...
And I'm free, free fallin'
Yeah I'm free, free fallin'
I wanna glide down over Mulholland
I wanna write her name in the sky
Gonna free fall out into nothin'
Gonna leave this world for a while

what are you sinking about?

The colored lights, they brightly shine.

Unlike your eyes avoiding mine.
The snow is folding sheet upon sheet.
Our hands not holding as we cross the street.

You have had your fill your fill of me.
You have had your fill your fill of me.

I wore the dress I thought you loved.
But my boots are filling with snow you shoved
Off of the car we climb into.
You finished first, I must catch up to you.

You have had your fill your fill of me.
You have had your fill your fill of me.

How can I catch up when I don't want to?
How can I catch up when I still want you?

You have had your fill your fill of me.

December baby, you are mine.

I wish you couldn't figure me out, but you'd always want to know what I was about.

WARNING: Obscure, vague, and slightly emo blog ahead. Read at your own risk.

GAhhhhh

I don't really know how to phrase everything that's going through my mind right now, and I'm not sure if I really want to sort through it all...but alksdhah;cba;hcaewsdh! Meh. I'm all jazzed up and antsy and I'm waiting again! I hate waiting! I just want to know what's going to happen next year, and I want to be settled. It's like last year, hovering over the giant black abyss that is my future (oh boy, now I'm getting dramatic...gah) not sure how the pieces are all going to fit together. And I know that things will come together, because they always do, but I just hate not knowing how. I feel stuck somewhere in between. I want to be on one side or the other! No more of this no man's (is that one word?) land. I just...meh.

Have you guys heard the song "Nicest Thing" by Kate Nash? I swear it is the most depressing song I have ever heard:

All I know is that you're so nice,
You're the nicest thing I've seen.
I wish that we could give it a go,
See if we could be something.

I wish I was your favourite girl,
I wish you thought I was the reason you are in the world.
I wish my smile was your favourite kind of smile,
I wish the way that I dressed was your favourite kind of style.

I wish you couldn't figure me out,
But you always wanna know what I was about.
I wish you'd hold my hand when I was upset,
I wish you'd never forget the look on my face when we first met.

I wish you had a favourite beauty spot that you loved secretly,
'Cos it was on a hidden bit that nobody else could see.
Basically, I wish that you loved me, (Katie's comment: GAH! knife through the heart right there!)
I wish that you needed me,
I wish that you knew when I said two sugars, actually I meant three.

I wish that without me your heart would break,
I wish that without me you'd be spending the rest of your nights awake.
I wish that without me you couldn't eat,
I wish I was the last thing on your mind before you went to sleep.

All I know is that you're the nicest thing I've ever seen;
I wish that we could see if we could be something

And that song has nothing to do with the above, but they both sort of give the same "gahh" contraction in your stomach kind of feeling. And for the second time in this post, let me just say "meh."