light at the end of the tunnel

We graduated!*

Well, Aaron did, officially. I just got to dress up in all of my graduation outfit glory and walk. Aaron spoke at graduation, and he did was awesome. I am just so proud of that guy! Seriously guys, I need to brag about him right now. He graduated with a B.S. in chemistry with a 4.0, in addition to TAing over 5 semesters and doing research in spectroscopy during the school year. He got accepted into 3 of the top 5 medical schools in the country. He got the organic chemistry student of the year sophomore year, physical chemistry student of the year junior year, inorganic chemistry student of the year and outstanding senior award senior year. He worked so hard for all of this! And he did it! And I'm so proud of him!

*end bragging*

It's weird, you know, being this close to done with my undergraduate education. It all went by so fast. Seems like last week I was living in the dorms in the flooding basement and watching "Scrubs" every Wednesday night with Amanda. I guess it's sort of good this way, because it doesn't feel like I'm done with university life yet. And I'm not. I've got another 5+ years ahead of researching, taking classes, TAing, doing homework, writing papers, etc. I like that idea.


But what campus is it that I'll be wandering around? I think we'll have a video announcement coming up on Monday?


*still have three classes left to knock out this semester: psychology, biochemistry 1, and French civ

the third and final continent

"While astronauts, heroes forever, spent mere hours on the moon, I have remained in this new world for nearly thirty years. I know that my achievement is quite ordinary. I am not the only man to seek his fortune far from home, and certainly I am not the first. Still, there are times I am bewildered by each mile I have traveled, each meal I have eaten, each person I have known, each room in which I have slept. As ordinary as it all appears, there are times when it is beyond my imagination."

Interpreter of Maladies by Jhumpa Lahiri

I love this quote. Somehow I feels like it fits with the end of the semester and being almost done (in June) with college. Me graduating with a chemistry is quite ordinary, but I am bewildered by what all has gone into the past four years of my life. Sometimes it was sucky, sometimes it was awesome, but it was always worth it.

*Also, if you haven't read any of Jhumpa Lahiri's books, you absolutely need to. Unaccustomed Earth is also fantastic. I have yet to find any other writer who can describe everyday, normal life in such a beautiful way. Love love love her. (And she's a Pulitzer Prize winner, so I'm not the only one who does!)

This is everything I remember from 09.18.2010

It all started with a perfect bun.

Frisbee game. The Deprotonators won again. Natalie took pictures, Brooklyn wore that adorable flouncy aqua skirt.

Borrowing Amy's lipstick again. Amy borrowing my eyelash glue.

Dancing. Being okay.

My mom crying.

Lying on the floor during cool down for the matinee performance, being not okay.

Going to Zupas. Eating salad (when do I ever get salad?). No ring at Wilson Diamonds.

Falling apart while writing a thank you note to Lee and Linda. Aaron calling. Me putting myself back together.

"My family wants to take pictures at the temple."
                   "Like this?"

"Are you serious?"

One knee.
"One thing ends, another begins."
Dave taking pictures. Me wearing sunglasses and smashing my fake eyelashes in funny directions. Wearing my European outfit-Becky's flowered aqua shirt, tucked in, shorts with the skinny brown belt.

Yes. Yes. Yes.

Everyone knew except me.

"Guess what?!" in the green room.

Whatever you're celebrating, stop for devotional.

"I'm engaged!!!!!"

Last show. As close to perfect as it was going to get. A tender mercy. No falls. Nothing shaky.
Shannon grabbing me from the dressing room. A good luck card from the team. Crying again. Ruined eyeliner for the 109234012834 time today.
Safety Dance Glee finale.
Sheer joy.

So many friends and family. Three bouquets. Me, Becky, and Mom. Crying all over again.
Matching Aaron's green polo.
Not knowing what to feel.

Putting away costumes. Good bye green Kaboom dress. Good bye lindy costume I never wore.

Dairy Queen (= glorified soft serve? Why did I never notice that as a 12 year-old?)
Blizzard. Freezing. Aaron's suitcoat.
Retelling "the story"
I told it different every time. Included the phone call, the Zupas lunch. Left them out.

Is it bad that I can't even remember the rest of that night? Calling Kim, Jody, Alyssa.
I opened the time capsule I made as a MIA maid. I wanted to name my children Madison and Tyler. I wanted my husband to have good sense of style so he could help me decorate our house.

I took out the bun. And fell asleep wearing a ring.

i own this decision

I feel good about quitting. It's been sad (and maybe I almost cry every time I tell someone I'm done), but I feel calm and okay about this. It's like for the first time in my life I decided on one thing I want to do. And I picked chemistry.

This is not to say that my semester will be any easier than usual. In fact, this will probably be the most difficult yet (can't believe I'm saying that after chem 391). I'm TAing (chem 391, of all classes), I'm working in the lab (trying to get enough data for a paper so that I can put that on my application for...), I'm applying to chemistry PhD programs, and I have other things going on that have yet to come to full fruition and so I'll hold off on announcing via blog just yet. 

Oh, and I'm sticking around for World of Dance this week (which means I'll be in the deJong every day from 5-10 this week), I'm taking four chemistry classes (2 lab classes = 13 hours/week, plus chem 521 and chem 514 = not easy), I have a 15 page paper in French on Occitan culture in southern France due in three weeks (that I have yet to actually start writing anything for), I'm (sort of?) the president of Y Chem and have an opening social to plan. 

Life centered around ballroom is over. Being a member of the team has been, without a doubt, the greatest part of my college experience. I am so grateful for the involvement that I have had with the company. Lee and Linda have been incredible to work with, and my teammates have been so wonderful.

I'm really glad that I have one more chance to dance this week during World of Dance.

And it would be really awesome if you guys could come, because this is it for me. This is the end of a ten-year long crazy involvement with ballroom. This is the last time I will be performing, possibly (and probably) forever.

So maybe if you're not doing anything, you could come and see my exit from the art that has held my attention and passion for so long. It would really, really, really mean a lot. 

Here's the website where you can buy tickets if you're interested.