somewhere in between

Just for today I would like to stop suffocating under the weight of to-do lists, unpacked boxes, unworked hours, and decisions.

So I did. I read Mockingjay until noon and then went to Jamba Juice with Kellie.

And then I came home and fell apart.

The end.

note to self:

day old donuts taste like day old donuts.

il faut avancer

One eternal afternoon* later, and I was home.

I'm torn. I am so, so glad to be home. I'm so happy to be back with Aaron. And I am so happy to start throwing myself into rehearsals and working in the lab and planning my school schedule and figuring out my life and everything else.

But I miss France. I miss hearing French everywhere and reading signs in French. I miss saying "Bonjour!" and "Au revoir!" when I enter and exit stores, elevators, buses. I miss eating jambon/emmental/beurre baguette sandwiches. I miss walking around the centre ville. I miss the metro. I miss the Mediterranean Sea. I miss weekend train trips. I miss the taste of French on my tongue and pastries in my mouth.

To everything there is a season I guess. My season in France is over. Must keep pedaling the bicycle forward or I shall lose my balance, a la Einstein:

"Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving."

Keep moving keep moving keep moving.
Can't help it; mostly I just want to sleep.

*okay, 11 hours if we're going to not exaggerate.

up and up?

Curse this 8 hour time difference!!

I just got an email informing me of my chemistry TA position, and I need some feedback here!!

Also, I need to decide once and for all what I am doing with my schedule this fall.

It's okay though, because in 24 hours I will already be in the Paris airport ready to take off for back home.

WOOoooo!!

be my escape

Yes, this post is another blatant plug for another event in The Valley.

BUT.

I've been having one of those rediscovering Relient K moments recently, because every morning I attempt to "work out" in my little room at the youth hostel here, and their songs are really great tempos for doing crunches and running around in little circles as you do "cardio". Anyway, so just about five minutes ago I was like, hey, I wonder if they have any shows coming up, because I swear like every summer they're here and I go to their concert and it's so awesome. I checked their website, and what do you know, their very next show is at Thanksgiving Point.

And! It's not only them, they're playing for the Candlelight Serenade Acoustic Festival which is also featuring a ton of other artists, including two I've been obsessed with lately, namely
Priscilla Ahn and Chris Carrabba (of Dashboard Confessional fame)

August 21st, from 10 AM to 11 PM, with people playing all day.
Only downside is cheapest tickets are $40 ($35 with a Costa Vida/Spoon Me discount card)...
and I already have plans to go boating that day.... (Priscilla's playing at 4:00)

AHhhhhh...I am so freaking tempted to go!

I mean, look how cute they are.

Click for more info!

i just keep happening upon awesome [free] local events:

Maybe you know Meg Fee from her awesome blog, The Wild and Wily Ways of a Brunette Bombshell. If you don't, I do believe it is about time you became acquainted.

She's here in Utah, and she'll be playing Juliet in "Romeo and Juliet" as part of Utah Shakespeare in the Park. There are a bunch of showings, all outside, all free, all through August and and half of September.

So maybe we could do another picnic dinner party and feel cultured some more?

(After a month and a half of scouting out every single fun thing you could possibly do in Toulouse, I have a feeling that I won't easily let that tendency go when I return home.)

More info here!

carmen san diego

For a while I thought that after this experience I'd be a total homebody and never want to leave the country again.

And while it's true that I'm longing for a little stability and a little bit more permanence, I think that just the opposite is true. I think I'm going to want to be a traveler for the rest de ma vie.

I would like to visit:
Asia: Tokyo, Hong Kong, and Beijing
South America (especially after reading "The Lacuna", talk about a beautiful portrait of Mexico)
Switzerland
Spain: Barcelona, Madrid, Seville, Malaga
France: Nice, anywhere in Provence, Marseilles, more Paris, anywhere in Bordeaux, anywhere in Brittany, more Normandy, anywhere in Alsace Lorraine (man, I love this country)

What about you guys? Where do you want to visit?

i forgot to mention:

The concert mentioned below is


FREE.

yessssssssss.

why do you let me stay here?

Ecoutez, mes amis.

Je vous propose:

She & Him concert

+ picnic dinner

August 26th, 7:00, Pioneer Park.
(I promise you want to come. Everyone brings a dish to share, we dress all indie, it'll be a blast!)

Because, really, who can say no to Zooey Deschanel?

and we stood at God's feet, equal-as we are!

"It is in vain to say human beings ought to be satisfied with tranquility: they must have action; and they will make it if they cannot find it. Millions are condemned to a stiller doom than mine, and millions are in silent revolt against their lot. Nobody knows how many rebellions besides political rebellions ferment in the masses of life which people earth. Women are supposed to be very calm generally: but women feel just as men feel; they need exercise for their faculties, and a field for their efforts as much as their brothers do; they suffer from too rigid a restraint, too absolute a stagnation, precisely as men would suffer; and it is narrow-minded in their more privileged fellow-creatures to say that they ought to confine themselves to making puddings and knitting stockings, to playing on the piano and embroidering bags. It is thoughtless to condemn them, or laugh at them, if they seek to do more or learn more than custom has pronounced necessary for their sex."


-Charlotte Bronte, Jane Eyre


I've been re-reading Jane Eyre lately, and my goodness, there are so many awesome quotes in this thing. Kudos to Miss Bronte for crafting such an awesome heroine. Probably Jane is my literary hero and Marie Curie still reigns as my actually lived hero (along with my mother, I should add). 


I can't even pick out a favorite line from this paragraph because I love how they all fit together. Ahh. So good.
I especially...appreciate? relate to? it now as I'm trying to figure out what to do with my life. It seems almost akin to blasphemy to say I want more than "just" to be a mom, but...I do? I realize that is by far the most important and most fulfilling thing I could ever do with my life, but...I want to...go to grad school? Maybe? Ugh, I don't know. I'll probably start class in 30 days (wow, how are we already in August?) and swear I never want to be put through any more of this academic misery, but secretly I love it. Even when I'm in the Benson Building until far too late because it makes me feel like I'm doing something...important? 


Sometimes, I guess I'm just scared that when I don't have homework to do, experiments to run, or chapters to read I'll feel totally insignificant.
I suppose I should sort out my priorities.


Thoughts?